Gar the Green Goof

In honor of our Sport-Touring.net friend Gar’s birthday today, I repost Toddrod’s ST.n ode to Dr. Seuss: Gar the Green Goof and a Hooter Named Bluepoof.

Here is a story
about a Hooter named Bluepoof…      
and the green evil doer named
Gar the Green Goof.                    

Bluepoof rides her red scooter
all over the place.
She laughs and she giggles
and rides at a very fast pace.

Gar the Green Goof became jealous
of Bluepoof and her fun.
“I’ll take that red scooter,
and Bluepoof’s fun will be done!”

Gar the Green Goof made a trap.
And hid in a bush to spy.
“Soon that red scooter will be mine!
I’m such an evil green guy!”                  

“Beep Beep” honked the horn,
on Bluepoof’s shiny red scooter.
She zipped and she zoomed,
and jumped over a Hooter!                    

When all of a sudden
there was a big BOOM!
And Gar the Green Goof
danced the Jig of Doom.

For low and behold
the red scooter was Gar’s!
And Bluepoof was in shock,
She was still seeing stars.                    

All of the Hooters were sad
at Bluepoof’s sudden loss.
While Gar the Green Goof
painted the scooter like green moss.

Gar rode the green scooter
all over the place.
He laughed and he giggled,
but rode at a much slower pace.

But Gar was still jealous
because Bluepoof was very fast.
“This scooter needs an exhaust,
suspension, and better gas!”

And all of the Hooters
were annoyed with Gar and his new scoot.
The scoot was now too loud,
and stinky to boot.

And Gar was a show off,
doing wheelies and tricks.
And he never rode faster,
He just showed off for kicks.

Then one day Gar the Green Goof
was doing some stunt.
When the moss green scooter
kicked him off with a punt!

And the Hooters all laughed,
and snorted, and yelled,
“Gar the Green Goof
is a dork! Look, he fell!”

Bluepoof called her insurance,
and filed a claim.
“Please replace my red scooter,
with another, the same.”

Now Bluepoof has her new scooter
And it’s a much brighter red.
And Gar the Green Goof
lies in a hospital bed.

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